All my edges feel frayed.
Squeezed tight to hold the pieces of me together.
Emotional waves crashing over me, trying to remember how I get to shore.
A fist, tight around my heart – the heartbreak of not being able to save my dear ones.
Can’t I hold myself together and them too?!
You need sleep.
You need a vacation.
*Deep, deep breaths*
Lock eyes with the One whose holding you, always.
“I can carry you.”
All of me.
And all of them.
“Here’s my heart, God. Speak what is true.”
Let my meltdown be into your arms.
Arms past the point of being able to carry, let all my pieces fall into your lap.
“And You crash over me, and I’ve lost control but I’m free. I’m beautifully in, over my head.”
REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE.
Remember whose you are.
By all means, fall apart – stop being strong – just fall like the Beloved. Lean back against His chest.
Selah over your testimony, those encounters of love.
Go back to there and soak it in.
DECLARE THE GOODNESS OF THE LORD, Oh Living Person.
Take that gift of breath and use it best.