My Dearest One


Friendship3This post is about my dearest friend, Pancake. (Yes, we have pet names for each other). Most times though, in my head, I refer to her as “My Dearest One.”

I’m not exactly sure, but I think I was a prig as a child, so the first time I met Pancake, I immediately decided she could not be my friend. Too chubby. Bangs too straight across her forehead. Too sitting shyly on the steps and staring. Then this girl, who was to become my bosom friend of 12 years, tried to teach me swear words. (Her friends before me were of questionable character).

Homeschool co-ops, Polly Pocket games, sleepovers, LHOTP, and a summer camp later and she was my one. My best friend.

For me, the moment we were best friends – but more than best friends, bosom friends – happened after that life-changing summer camp. Dearest One had invited me to come to church with her. We got there early because her parents were leading worship. We took this path through the woods to a circle dirt trail that, I believe, people would four-wheel around. We walked around and around the path and talked about the summer camp and what God was becoming to us. It wasn’t the first conversation we had like that and it wasn’t the last, but it is the moment I can pinpoint when I knew my heart was safe with Anastasia. I had been hiding my inner self from everyone for so long (without good reason) and suddenly there was someone I knew I could trust it to. She was the first friend I ever felt safe with.

You see, Pancake is like the best sugar cookie. She’s just the right buttery flake, the right thick chewiness with soft, fluffy frosting and perfect sugar sprinkles. Basically she is so kind and loving without even trying that no one could dislike her. She’s like a great, big, giant heart. I can’t think of a time when she has laughed at my heart. (Sadly, I know that I have done that to her on occasion). She treats feelings with respect. Like, she doesn’t make fun of the things that are so incredibly important to me even though logically they shouldn’t be that important and deserve to be mocked.

And she treats all people this way. Strangers! People on the internet! She is honoring to everyone she encounters. It’s basically her life motto. Love and Honor.

She’s such a complicated person. It’s going to take you a while to get to know her. She loves so many different things and is so completely right while seemingly contradictory. A glance at her iTunes would show that. If you assume she is just a sweet, kind girl you’re missing so much of the woman she is. She is strong and independent and wild and bold and quiet and secretly gangsta. She loves a party and loves being alone. She writes songs and stories. She’s passionate about Doctor Who. She’s nerdy in her own way. Somehow she takes all these eclectic things and they fit perfectly. Her fashion sense reflects this. Girl can wear anything! She is so comfortable and confident in herself.

There are so many character qualities she has that I wish I had. She loves people so well and so openly. I’m great at loving people, but only the people that are close to me. She is great at loving that lady at the cash register or that person on the geek Facebook  page.

I know a lot of this may sound kinda like a generic description of a strong feminist woman, but that’s the amazing thing about Tasia. I’ve seen her turn into this person, although at the same time I’ve always seen her as this person, and it’s not because she chose to be strong or independent or loving. She is so fully her because she has experiences with Daddy/Jesus/Marmee that open her eyes to who she has always been.

I can’t believe that I’ve gotten to witness that. I feel so very honored that God gave me her. That I got to grow up with her and that we both got to share our times of discovering Daddy’s heart with each other. She went from being afraid of people’s opinions to singing and dancing through the halls of the community college while I was her friend. It’s like her future keeps expanding before her as she expands into herself and I get to watch.

Pancake, we are the coolest.

“I am an adventurer now with a friendship for the ages.” (oh.em.gee that quOTE SO APPLIES TO US NOW).

*virtual best hug ever*



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